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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28927614">the penguin &amp; the fancy bird</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/villiageidiot/pseuds/villiageidiot'>villiageidiot</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>HM500 Prompts [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Shadowhunters (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alec Lightwood Loves Magnus Bane, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 09:27:21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>500</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28927614</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/villiageidiot/pseuds/villiageidiot</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>we live in a world where a penguin can fall in love with a fancy bird</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>HM500 Prompts [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2121645</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>70</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Hunter's Moon 500 Prompts</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>the penguin &amp; the fancy bird</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>HM500 Prompt: pain</p><p>Inspired by a prompt by the wonderful folks at the Malec Discord Server</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Alec is at the zoo. He has no memory of how this has come to pass. </p><p>He assumes it has something to do with Magnus saying, “Let’s go to the zoo,” and Alec’s inability to say no to him.</p><p>But Alec has never wanted to go to the zoo. No one should find joy in seeing tiny imprisoned animals. No one.</p><p>Simon and Izzy stop outside the penguin exhibit, and Alec narrows his eyes when he sees Magnus texting someone. That asshole talked him into coming, and he isn’t even <i>looking</i> at the tiny imprisoned animals.</p><p>Alec could not possibly care less about the penguins living a few feet away in their open-concept jail cell, but Simon and Clary are intently reading the little podium of facts.</p><p>“Penguins live in Antarctica,” Alec says irritably.</p><p>“Not this type,” Simon says, sounding proud about knowing a fact he literally just read. “Galapagos Penguins live above the equator.”</p><p>Something catches Alec’s eye in the back of the penguin prison, a swirl of bright color and movement. Jace follows his gaze and asks, “What the hell is that?”</p><p>Alec squints at the colorful object and notices it’s a really bright bird standing in front of a penguin, dramatically puffing out its chest.</p><p>“A Bird of Paradise!” Clary says brightly. “They do this courtship ritual-”</p><p>“Courtship ritual?” Jace asks skeptically. “He’s courting that penguin?”</p><p>Alec watches as the colorful bird’s neck suddenly flares up and seems to explode. “Oh my god,” he says, startled. “Is it okay?”</p><p>“That’s his ritual,” Clary says, shrugging. “Dramatically trying to attract mates with his beauty.”</p><p>Jace rubs his neck, possibly envisioning his own neck exploding. “That looks fucking painful.”</p><p>Alec watches as the not-actually-exploded feathers settle back down. Then the bird does it again.</p><p>“That bird really wants to woo that penguin,” Simon says sympathetically. He knows a thing or two about unrequited love.</p><p>They all watch the penguin waddle away, leaving the poor bird alone. But he doesn’t rejoin his fellow penguin inmates. Instead, he pokes around the rocky terrain, sifting through a pile of pebbles. He finds one, satisfied, and carries it back to the bird, laying it in front of him.</p><p>“Oh… my… god,” Clary says. “Now the <i>penguin</i> is courting the<i> bird</i>.”</p><p>“Giving a rock is penguin courtship?” Jace asks disdainfully.</p><p>And for no discernible reason at <i>all</i>, Alec gets defensive. “So? It likes giving little gifts. People can… <i>court</i> in different ways.”</p><p>Izzy raises an eyebrow. “People?”</p><p>“Animals,” Alec quickly corrects.</p><p>She gives him a knowing look but doesn’t say anything.</p><p>“Well, that’s a doomed relationship,” Jace says.</p><p>“You don’t know that,” Clary argues.</p><p>Jace stares at her. “Clary, it’s a penguin and a fancy bird.”</p><p>“That’s how evolution works, though,” Simon says. With a pointed look in Alec’s direction, he adds, “Completely different peop - I mean <i>animals</i> - can fall in love.”</p><p>Alec closes his eyes and sighs at the implication that he is a metaphorical lovesick penguin.</p><p>He deeply, <i>deeply</i> resents the zoo.</p>
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